They don’t argue back, they’re wonderful listeners, they love cuddles, and they never lose enthusiasm for seeing you at the end of a long day. Animals are the best, aren’t they? They’re so awesome, in fact, that sometimes I think I like them better than people (my family excluded, ahem). Here are some warning signs to look out for to see if you, too, tend to like animals better than humans:
1. When you get some great news, the first “person” you want to tell is your dog.
2. When you snuggle up on the couch to binge-watch Downton Abbey, the warm body next to you has furry legs and paws.
3. That secret ingredient in your amazing coconut-vanilla cupcakes (and all of your cooking, really) is 1 dog hair.
4. When your cat starts to cough up a hairball (again), you’re at the ready with a towel or paper bag to catch the mess before it hits the floor.
5. When holiday shopping, you can easily spend 30 minutes deciding whether she’d rather have the pink or red heart-shaped chew toy.
6. “Vacation!!” means hitting the road for some fun in the sun at your favorite pet-friendly hotels, beaches and restaurants.
7. When the person next to you on your flight to New York brings a ferret on board as an “Emotional Support Animal,” you don’t bat an eyelash.
8. You actually think rat tails are cute.
9. When your neighbor adopts a dog from the local animal shelter, your first question is, “Is it a boy or a girl?”
10. “Deathly afraid of needles” quickly turns into “superstar subcutaneous fluids-giver” when your cat becomes diagnosed with kidney failure.
11. When your best friend talks about her new shoes, you immediately think of your horse’s shoeing appointment you forgot to schedule.
12. The first thing you see in the morning when you wake up is your cat’s stomach laying across your face.
13. Your favorite smells are puppy breath and fresh manure at the barn.
14. When you find a spider in your apartment, you summon all your bravery and find a glass (or wide-mouthed jar, depending the size) to safely put it outside.
15. Your dog knows how to eat off a fork.
What about you? (Guilty as charged?) When did you know you were a delightfully unapologetic animal person?